Many of us in the LGBTQ+ community know the struggle of finding true connection. Sure, dating apps, pride events, and online forums are teeming with opportunities to connect, but sometimes it feels… surface-level. How do you find meaningful relationships, friendships, or even just safe spaces to be your genuine self? That’s the question this guide aims to answer.

Read on for tips, tricks, and empathetic advice for authentically connecting within the diverse and vibrant LGBTQ+ community.

Why Authentic Connections Matter 

The LGBTQ+ community is built on shared experiences of resilience, celebration, and self-expression. However, just because someone shares your identity or experiences doesn’t always mean automatic compatibility. People are beautifully complex! Authentic connections allow you to build deeper, more fulfilling relationships—be they platonic, romantic, or otherwise.

Building true bonds involves trust, kindness, and an understanding of individuality within our shared spaces. Whether you’re looking for friendships, networking opportunities, or exploring a trans dating app, having a strong network of genuine people is priceless.

The Challenges of Building LGBTQ+ Connections 

Making connections as queer, trans, or non-binary individuals can come with its difficulties:

  • Geography: If you live in a smaller city or rural area, the queer community might feel smaller (or harder to find). 
  • Safety Concerns: LGBTQ+ individuals often have to consider safety before openly expressing who they are. 
  • Surface Interactions: Social media and certain meet-ups can feel shallow, making it harder to establish deeper connections. 

Acknowledging these barriers is the first step in overcoming them. 

Tips for Building Authentic LGBTQ+ Connections 

To truly connect within the LGBTQ+ community, you need to approach this with both courage and curiosity. Here’s a roadmap to guide you:

1. Explore LGBTQ+ Events and Spaces 

One of the best ways to connect authentically is by showing up in places already designed for the community. Look for events and gatherings such as pride parades, queer art showcases, book clubs, or LGBTQ+ workshops. You’ll meet amazing folks who share your interests and passions. 

If there aren’t in-person gatherings near you, explore virtual spaces. Many organizations host online events—you just might find people you connect with across the world! 

Example Opportunities: 

  • Join a queer hiking club. 
  • Check out LGBTQ+ film festivals or writing groups. 
  • Find meetups catered to specific niches—like Latinx, Black LGBTQ+, or trans individuals. 

2. Use LGBTQ+-Friendly Apps Intentionally 

For many, apps are the ultimate way to meet people today (thanks, technology!). While dating might be your first thought, remember that not all apps are about swiping for romance. But if romance is the goal, seek out apps specifically designed to cater to LGBTQ+ folks—for example, if you’re a trans person navigating the dating world, a trans dating app might be a better fit than generic ones.

For friendships or other connections, there are apps like HER for LGBTQ+ women and lesbian communities or queer meetup platforms where genuine discussions and bonds thrive.

3. Volunteer or Get Involved in Advocacy 

Community grows when we all contribute to its thriving. Many LGBTQ+ nonprofits, activism groups, or advocacy organizations are looking for people to join their efforts. Volunteering is a powerful way to meet others with similar values and compassion.

Not only do you make a difference, but you can also end up forming meaningful connections with fellow volunteers and activists who want to drive change alongside you.

4. Join Online LGBTQ+ Communities 

Finding local connections isn’t always an option. But that’s the beauty of the internet—it eliminates borders. Platforms like Reddit have thriving LGBTQ+ sub-communities, Discord often features queer-specific servers, and even private Facebook groups focus on building community.

When engaging online, try moving beyond “likes” and “shares” to real discussions. Comment, support people publicly, and foster meaningful dialogue. 

Pro tip: If you’re on spaces like Instagram or TikTok, engage thoughtfully with creators who inspire you—genuine conversations often start in the comments. 

5. Be Honest About Your Needs & Boundaries 

You can’t build authentic relationships if they’re based on who you think you should be. Showing up authentically, being clear about your boundaries, and expressing what you’re seeking (whether it’s friendship, mentorship, or love) can make a world of difference. 

It’s okay to admit if you’re looking to expand your circle, create a chosen family, or explore beyond romance. Authenticity begets authenticity. 

6. Explore Diverse Subgroups within LGBTQ+ Spaces 

Our community isn’t one-size-fits-all. An intersectional approach to interacting with others can open doors to deeper understanding and connection. For instance, engaging with groups or spaces that center experiences you don’t share (e.g., attending events hosted by Black queer collectives when you’re not Black) can expand your empathy and introduce you to incredible new allies and friends. 

Approaching Connection with Empathy 

It’s not just about finding your people—it’s about being someone else’s safe space, too. Whether you’re using a trans dating app, joining a knitting group for queer creatives, or attending a conference on LGBTQ+ rights, show up with empathy. 

Here are a few keys to fostering reciprocal relationships:

  • Listen before you speak. 
  • Offer support without assuming you know someone’s experience. 
  • Understand that community members may be in different stages of their personal journeys. 

When you approach new connections as both a seeker and a giver, the bond develops naturally—based on mutual respect and kindness. 

Find and Build Your Network Today 

Remember, finding authentic connections in the LGBTQ+ community isn’t a race or a challenge to conquer. It’s a process. Start in spaces where you feel comfortable, gradually branch out, and be mindful of the reciprocal energy required for meaningful relationships.

Are you feeling inspired to put yourself out there? Consider taking the first step today. Whether that’s joining a new local group or exploring a trans dating app, now is the time to build the connections you deserve.

Cheers to your growing chosen family!