The world of online dating is a vast and daunting place, but a necessary evil for people looking for love these days. You may chance upon the love of your life, but minimally you may meet some individuals that will teach you more about yourself and what you are looking for in a partner. Below are some strategies to make your online dating experiences, whether you are a veteran or a new-comer, positive ones to remember.
Complete your profile as much as possible
In the absence of meeting in person, your online profile is literally the only thing that potential dates would know and see of you. So make it count! Fill out the questions and prompts honestly, if there are any, and if there aren’t, you can always put things about yourself that you think you would like to know about other people. For example, your height, your profession, or your favorite weekend activity to name a few.
Make sure your photos are up to date
A front runner for dating profile pet peeves: having outdated profile pictures. It’s great that you looked like the hulk ten years ago, but you have since softened up a little – and that’s okay! Maybe your hair is a different color now. Regardless, put your selfies out there and always keep them current so there are no surprises for anyone.
Leave Your Ex in the Past, Not Present
Another strong no-no in the world of online dating would be to include photos of yourself with your most recent ex, or any for that matter. It’s alright if you two are still friends with appropriate boundaries, but the person on the other side of the screen wants to see you as you are now and not who you were when you were with them.
Save Your Life’s Story for When You Are “Official”
Everyone has their own story, and it’s important for your potential partner to know at least some of it – eventually. A first date, or even a second or third, is not the time to be shelling out every insecurity that you have from the traumas of your childhood. Should you feel comfortable enough in the future when you two are invested, then it may be a good idea to share. Start with your favorite movies or foods first.
Give just enough details
To add to the previous point, give your potential dating prospects just enough detail but do not drown them in the nitty-gritty aspects of your life. This can be on your profile at the outset, or through regular text conversation. You will want to keep things light to start and just see how things flow all the same. And always make sure that there is a back and forth so you are neither dominating the conversation nor learning nothing about the other person.
Ask them Questions About Themselves
When you are trying to strike up some initial conversation, it’s always easiest to start with a question. Some of the tried and true include things about what they do, what activities they enjoy, and things of that nature. People like talking about themselves – take this opportunity to learn about who you matched with and to see how they talk about themselves as well.
Maybe overstated, but never unimportant, is trying to relax into being yourself. You don’t want to come off as some type of way online, and then meet the person in real life only for them to find out you are totally different. Try not to say things you wouldn’t normally say to impress this person and give off a vibe that is authentically you.
Be clear about what you are looking for
This one is important: always be clear about what you want out of the relationship. If you are looking for your one true love, say so. If you really just want to start meeting a lot of new people, put it in your profile. If you don’t really know what you want, let them know that, too. Communication is important in all stages of dating, so start off by being open about your expectations.
Don’t Push their Boundaries
If you begin to notice that something you do or say is making the other person uncomfortable, you need to take a step back. Online dating can be tricky, especially because tone and voice inflection is mostly lost through texting. Check in with that person and ask if they are uncomfortable with something. Or better yet, just stop doing whatever it is you were doing in the first place.
You should also get on as many top hookup apps online as possible. This will give you a higher chance of matching with as many people as you can and going on as many dates as you can.
Be Confident, but Not Arrogant
There is a fine line to walk between being confident in yourself and coming off as being kind of arrogant. Do mention things you are proud of or hobbies that you enjoy that you may excel at. You will simultaneously want to avoid bragging about these things in such a way that it makes the other person feel left out or looked down upon.
Take Care of Yourself
This seems like a no-brainer but for anyone who is thinking otherwise, it is extremely important to actively care for yourself. This would include things like keeping proper hygiene, getting enough sleep, and wearing clean clothing. Demonstrating to someone, even if it’s through a video chat, that you do care about this kind of stuff shows that you are an excellent potential dating partner to meet see face-to-face.
Dress to Impress
For the night that you do finally meet up with your date, wear something that nice and is appropriate for the setting. That doesn’t mean to wear a suit to the movies, but don’t reach for your coziest (but stained) t-shirts or pants that are just a little too loose for you. You want to make a good first impression, so find something that makes you look good and feel good, too.
Thanks for sharing these tips!