Life is full of expected and unexpected events. There are some that are within our control and others that aren’t quite. It is usually your job as a parent, however, to adequately prepare them for the changes to come. There are many ways that you can go about doing that, but most of it consists of effective and open communication. These major changes usually tend to be inevitable in most cases, so it’s important that when you’re faced with such scenarios, you know what to do. This article aims to look at four different major life events that are likely to have a significant impact on your kids and ways you can make it easier for them.
Moving
Moving somewhere new is bound to have a major impact on your kids whether positive or negative. You may need to move for reasons such as work, buying your first home, remortgaging for a change of environment, or other important reasons. If you presently happen to be in this situation, informing your kids before you start making any moves is a good idea. You could begin by telling them you need to move and explaining why it’s necessary. You can then take them to visit their new neighborhood and show them the positive aspects of it. This should help them feel more optimistic if they aren’t enthusiastic about moving. Involving them in the moving process may also be a good approach as well. In terms of packing, you can make that a family affair and throw in food and music while you do it. It is also important that you ask your kids how they feel about the move so that you can tackle any negative thoughts or fears they may have due to them moving away from the people and environment they’re used to.
Divorce
When a marriage ends and kids are involved, it can have a major impact on them. For one, it means that the family unit they’re used to is going to change. You should attempt to sit your kids down and have a heart to heart with them regarding the status of your marriage and why it’s ending. Try your best not to speak negatively about your partner so that you don’t cause a rift between them and your former spouse and feelings of resentment.
It may be a very difficult period for them as they’ll have to adjust to a different home setting and possibly living in a new home. Some ways children can act out when divorce negatively affects them include misbehaving at school, feeling the financial strain of living in a single parent household, and blaming parents for everything that goes wrong. Some ways to avoid these negative outcomes include trying family counseling, not speaking negatively about your partner, continuously communicating with your kids, and making them feel love and stability at all times.
Death
A sudden death of someone close to your family can affect your kids. Depending on their ages, it can be hard for kids to assimilate death, so you’ll have to try your best to support them in any way you can. All children grieve in different ways, so try and figure out how your child is grieving whether it be by acting out at home or in school, not eating, isolating themselves, or becoming unusually quiet. Consider finding therapy for them if they don’t seem open to talking to you about it.
An Addition to the Family
Another major life event that will likely affect your kids is an addition to your family. This could be through the means of you expecting a new child or adopting one. This has differing effects depending on the nature of the child. While some are excited and enthusiastic about the new addition, others may not be. When a new sibling arrives, toddlers are more likely to exhibit feelings of aggression, anger, and jealousy while teens are more likely to be more understanding but have underlying feelings of jealousy and envy. It is, therefore, best that you have a conversation with them beforehand and assure them that you will still love them the same as well as inform them about what’s likely to change. Making them feel like a part of the process may also help them by giving them a sense of responsibility and pride regarding their new sibling.
You can’t always predict what direction life will take you and your family in. You can, however, try your best to always communicate openly with your kids and carry them along irrespective of what you’re facing. They won’t always understand, but you’d be surprised how many instances they may. Rest assured that at the end of the day, no matter what happens, with time, patience, and love, your family should be just fine.
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