We spend so much time taking care of everyone else that we sometimes miss what’s happening with our own health. Between packing lunches, managing schedules, helping with homework, and keeping the household running, our needs often come last. That’s exactly why addiction can sneak up on us without anyone noticing, sometimes not even ourselves.

It might start innocently enough. A glass of wine to unwind after a particularly tough day with the kids. Pain medication after a surgery or injury that somehow becomes a daily habit. Prescription anxiety medication that you find yourself taking more frequently than prescribed. For moms, these substances can feel like the only break we get in an otherwise non-stop day.

Woman holding her neck in pain while sitting on a bed.

The tricky part is that we’re good at hiding things and pushing through. We’ve mastered the art of functioning on little sleep, managing chaos, and keeping everything together on the outside. So when something’s wrong, we often keep going longer than we should. We tell ourselves we’re handling it, that we don’t have time to fall apart, that everyone depends on us.

But our bodies and minds eventually send clearer messages. You might find yourself counting down the hours until you can have that drink or take that pill. The amount you need keeps increasing to get the same relief. You start hiding your use from your partner or kids. You feel anxious or physically uncomfortable when you can’t access what you’ve been using.

Your patience wears thinner than usual. You snap at your kids over small things. You cancel plans with friends because you’d rather stay home where you can use freely. Activities you used to enjoy with your family, like those camping trips or outdoor adventures, start feeling like obligations rather than fun. You might find yourself making excuses to skip them entirely.

The mom guilt hits hard when you start realizing something’s off. You beat yourself up for not being the parent you want to be. You wonder how you let things get to this point. You worry about what your kids will think or how it will affect them. That guilt can actually make things worse, creating a cycle where you use to escape the bad feelings about using.

Money becomes a hidden stressor too. Whether it’s spending too much on wine, doctor shopping for prescriptions, or other expenses related to your habit, the financial strain adds another layer of stress. You might find yourself hiding purchases or being secretive about money in ways you never were before.

Here’s what I want you to know as one mom to another. Needing help doesn’t make you a bad parent. In fact, recognizing you need support and getting it makes you a great parent. You’re modeling for your kids that it’s okay to struggle and brave to ask for help. You’re showing them that taking care of yourself matters.

Getting professional treatment might feel impossible when you have a family counting on you. Who will handle everything while you’re gone? How will you explain it to your kids? What will other parents think? These concerns are valid, but they shouldn’t stop you from getting well. Many treatment programs understand the unique challenges moms face and can help you plan for your family’s needs during recovery.

Places like Seasons in Malibu offer programs designed with the whole person in mind, recognizing that moms need specialized support that addresses our specific situations. Quality treatment centers work with you to create a plan that makes sense for your family while giving you the intensive help you need.

Your kids need a healthy mom more than they need a mom who’s barely holding it together. Taking time to get well isn’t abandoning them. It’s investing in being present and fully engaged in their lives for years to come. The soccer games, the family dinners, the road trips, all of those moments matter so much more when you’re truly there for them.

If you’re reading this and recognizing yourself, please reach out to someone. Talk to your doctor, a therapist, or a trusted friend. Look into treatment options. You deserve to feel good again, and your family deserves to have all of you back.