One of the most life-altering experiences anyone can have is raising children. They are a full-body commitment that demands everything, and that level of sacrifice does change you on emotional, spiritual, and yes, physical levels.
It’s such a profound experience that many parents, and in particular, mothers, find themselves at a loss once their children grow up and move out of the home. If you feel like so much of your identity and even personality has been wrapped up in motherhood, it can feel incredibly daunting, or even like you are unmoored, once they’ve moved out. You haven’t stopped being a mother, but you have stopped being a caretaker, and that is a significant shift.
The good news is that you don’t need to remain adrift. Instead, you can follow this path towards rediscovery:
Try Everything to Discover What You Like Now
Forget what you liked to do in the past. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t pick up old hobbies or interests, but those are part of the old you. You need to discover who you are now, and that means embracing curiosity.
Try taster sessions of everything. Meet new people, attend events in subjects you didn’t particularly know about. Take this time to rediscover what’s out there, and, in the process, what you can do within it.
Take Care of Your Spiritual Self
One of the most impactful ways you can rediscover your true self is to embrace spirituality. You can do this on your own, yes, but for a more direct approach, consider following a spiritual awakening guide. These guides can help you live more mindfully while also connecting with your true self. It’s a powerful approach that, most critically, comes with a community, allowing you to embrace not only your spiritual side but also new friends. You can continue your journey through yoga or spiritual retreats, or simply integrate the life lessons into your regular routine.
Adapt Traditions and Routines
Raising children inevitably means taking them to activities, helping them with homework, teaching them, spending time with them, and even ferrying them to and fro. When they move out, all that energy you used to spend on them now has nowhere to go (and why empty-nest syndrome can be so jarring), which is why you need to adapt those traditions and routines into new ones. Instead of taking your kids to their after-school practice, take up your own after-work classes. Instead of making dinner for the whole family, invite friends over for dinner parties.
Most Importantly, Build New Routines with Your Children
While your children may have moved out, they will always need their parents, just in new, different ways. That’s why it’s so important that you build new routines with your children. Call on a semi-regular basis to stay caught up on all that’s happening. Organize get-togethers. Rework older traditions so they’re ready for a reality where your children don’t just live upstairs. You can find meaning in being a parent after your kids move out; you simply need to adjust and build a new relationship standard with your kids.
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